My Life: Old & Present

Growing up as a little boy aged thirteen, I was bright and full of life. I was looking forward to growing up and becoming a fireman, but things changed once I was at secondary school. I became involved with some boys who all smoked, and within a few months I was smoking - even though I hated it. I wanted to fit in and be part of the in crowd. One day I was offered cannabis, which I tried unaware it would change my life forever.

Within a few months of smoking cannabis I lost interest in school and played truant; I was expelled and ended up in referral centres and young offenders units, as I started to commit crimes to pay for my habit. At fifteen I joined a gang, also unaware it would become violent, dangerous and ugly; and that once I was involved I couldn't leave. Over the next six years I became the leader of our gang, I was kidnapped and nearly killed over drugs and money, by the time I reached the age of twenty-one I was drinking alcohol every night and taking ecstasy and lots of cannabis.

Then I was introduced to heroin and crack cocaine and within a year of smoking them I lost five stone as I would go for days without eating, and weeks without washing or brushing my teeth. At age twenty-two I had my first hit of heroin-crack, and soon found myself in crack-houses sharing needles and injecting up to fifty times a day. I walk around today with syringe needles still stuck in my arms, and open wounds on my legs that have never healed, I still have to visit the hospital to have them dressed.

Me and my gang all carried knifes and in total I was stabbed seven times, nearly losing my life. I also got involved with gun crime, running round London robbing dealers, having to find a minimum of £400-£500 a day to feed my habit. Things got so bad that doctors wanted to have my legs amputated but another hospital treated them using thousands of maggots to eat the dead flesh and fortunately saved them.

I went into rehab and got better. I've been clean and sober for many years now. I now visit schools all over the UK sharing my story; since May 2009 I've spoken to 100,000 young people, some as young as seven.

There were ten of us in my gang. Five are dead, three are suffering from severe mental health problems, one is serving life in prison: it is stemmed from misuse of drugs and alcohol.